Post by Brophdog88 on May 13, 2010 19:54:14 GMT -5
"There are only two reasons to sit in the back row of an airplane: Either you have diarrhea, or you are anxious to meet people who do. -Henry Kissinger (former US Secretary of State[EXTRACT]I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph. -Shirley Temple[EXTRACT]A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you do not need it. -Bob Hope[EXTRACT]A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author. -G. K. Chesterton[EXTRACT]Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. -Tiger Woods[EXTRACT]When an affliction happens to you, you either let it defeat you, or you defeat it... -Rosalind Russell[EXTRACT]Television - a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done. -Ernie Kovacs[EXTRACT]We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. -Aristotle[EXTRACT]A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you do not need it. -Bob Hope[EXTRACT]Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money. -Joey Bishop[EXTRACT]Stupid people always think they are right. Wise people listen to advice. - Proverbs 12:15[EXTRACT]"Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me." -Ambrose Bierce[EXTRACT]First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering.[EXTRACT]When you are as great as I am it is hard to be humble. - Muhammad Ali [EXTRACT]The wise man does at once what the fool does finally. -Baltasar Gracian[EXTRACT]Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. -Sam Levenson[EXTRACT]luge strategy? Lie flat and try not to die. -Carmen Boyle (Olympic Luge Gold Medal winner - 1996)[EXTRACT]Information is not knowledge. - Albert Einstein [EXTRACT]A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you do not need it. -Bob Hope[EXTRACT]There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other. -Douglas Everett[EXTRACT]My cousin just died. He was only 19. He got stung by a bee - the natural enemy of a tightrope walker. -Dan Rather (News anchorman)[EXTRACT]Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school. - Albert Einstein [EXTRACT]Television - a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done. -Ernie Kovacs[EXTRACT]The problem with the French is that they have no word for entrepreneur. - George Bush[EXTRACT]I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I am more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves. -Jerry Garcia