Post by Kruwaukee on Jun 10, 2010 17:44:37 GMT -5
Michael Wilbon
Tony Kornheiser
PTI…..
Hey boys and girls and welcome to the first edition of UOSLR PTI. And when the wind blows hard and the sky is black….Ducks fly together. I’m Tony Kornheiser.
And I’m Michael Wilbon. Today we have a lot to talk about. Hardcap, Draft Grades, Position rankings, and special guest Charles Barkley will join us for five good minutes.
Barkley? No quiero taco bell.
Tony you are an enchilada. Ok Headlines!
Hard Cap
Tony we’ve recently seen more and more teams going over the hard cap in recent years. Should the hard cap be raised or are these owners just being foolish with their money?
Wilbon I’m a New York Yankees fan so I’m all about spending money.
Tony this is BASKETBALL.
I know but owner s should spend as much money as they need to in order to compete. If they can do it then why not? Raise the cap.
But Tony we’re seeing guys like Eddie Griffin get signing 100+ million dollar deals and this is a guy who’s averaging 11ppg for his career. I can name more names. The max contract is the death of so many teams.
Survival of the fittest Wilbon and my wallet is stacked!
Buzzzer…
Champs
Wilbon the Clippers won their first championship in franchise history. Whats next for the LA Clippers.
Tony I was so happy to see the Clippers win. They were faithful to their guys Arenas and Ming and they delivered them to the promise land.
Their boy AI went out in the sunset. They’re done. They are less of a one hit wonder than Bizmarkie.
You can’t take away a ring.
Paying Yao all that money will sink their franchise.
You can’t let Yao walk.
Buzzzzer……..
Timberwolves
The Timberwolves made Amare Stoudemire the highest paid PF in the game this week giving him a 160 million dollar contract. However they are over the hardcap. What’s next for the T-Wolves.
Tony, its obvious that Trunks is still looking to compete next season. He just got a contract renewal after showing some promise last season and the last thing they want to do is tear it down again in Minnesota.
Yes but Trunks can’t go all John Wayne by spending crazy money and think at the end of the movie he’s not going to get shot.
So what do they do Tony, tell me.
When the hardcap hits your eye like a big pizza pie trade Amare!
How do you trade that kind of contract? Who’s in the market? No one. They have to keep him. If they can find anyone dumb enough to take on Sean Williams that’s the move to make.
I just feel bad for James Harden he’s been stuck in Minnesota his whole career.
At least he has a ticket out now!
Good Point, Wilbon. Whats next?
Buzzzer….
Michael Gilchrist
Tony, We saw Perry Jones make one of the biggest splashes into UOSLR a #1 pick has ever seen. Can Michael Gilchirist keep that going?
Wilbon, you know I don’t speak highly of many people. Hell I’m not even nice to most people.
Yea I know your wife tells me that all the time.
Pshh nonsense. Michael Gilchrist will be the best big man in the league. EVER.
Wow. Ever? Forever ever?
Yes he can do things that no one else can do athletically as well as fundamentally. He’s the real deal.
Hmm so what does he average next season?
20,9,4, 1,2.
Ok we’ll see!
Final Buzzer…
Ok that’s all we have for headlines…when we get back we’ll take 5 good minutes to talk to our big mouth friend Charles Barkley.
Big mouthed? More like just big…
Theme music…..
Ok we’re back with UOSLR great Charles Barkley
Hey Tony you know what you can get at Taco Bell for $2.
Diarrhea?
No that’s turrible Tony. You should just shave that head of yours already look like Wilbon and I.
You know how terrible white guys look bald?
Why this got to be a race thing? Andre Aggassi, Matt Hassleback,
Jeff Garcia.
Yea I’m more of a Larry David though.
Ok I’ve had enough of this! Charles what do you left the league early then came back. What do you think of AI retiring?
He could have played more but why should he? He won 3 championships and left at the top of his game winning Finals MVP. That’s great just like the new cheese gordita at Taco Bell.
So do you think Etienne Priera is staying in the league too long?
No that guy is a freak. Another animal. I can’t explain what he does or how he does it. How old is that guy 39? He’s still whooping up those young boys. I want to see him play until he is 50. I think he can do it. He must eat Taco Bell.
Are there any players in the league right now that remind you of yourself?
You know there is only one Charles Barkley but there are few good impersonators. I’d probably say Dwight Howard.
Dwight Howard?
Yea he’s close to my level athletically and domination but like I said there is only one Chuck. Great show by the way best on TV. Love that dude more than D-Wade who hasn’t called me in a week. Whats up D-wade I thought we were friends.
Ok our time is up. Always a pleasure Charles.
Thanks for having me. (munching on a taco)
When we get back we’ll toss up some of the leagues hottest debates.
Theme music
Ok we’re back. What do we got stat boy?
Amare or Yao
Tony I got to go with my boy Yao Ming. He’s got the ring
Are you kidding? Amare could jump over him like Vince Carter does to people in other countries in the Olympics.
Maybe he isn’t as flashly but Yao is fundamental and does everything that his team needs him to do. That’s the player I want.
Amare FTW. Next!
Kyrie Irving or Corey Joseph
This is tough. I think they’re both going to be great.
Tony this is toss up not toss around. Pick!
Ok ok I’m going with Corey Joseph because the Duke curse in UOSLR is worse than Madden cover.
What? that’s crazy.
Jay Williams, Mike Dunleavy, Carlos Boozer…Do I need to say more?
Ducky or Ashes
We’re going to make someone really mad here.
Ashes is exactly that dust in the wind.
You quack me up. This isn’t even a debate. Ducky has earned the respect of everyone in the league. Ashes was great but out with the old and in with the new.
Charles Barkley or Taco Bell
Hahahaa….producers got jokes. I’m going to go with Charles Barkley because I don’t want diarrhea.
Tony have you ever had Taco Bell its amazing and cheap on the wallet. Its hard to pick it over my boy Chuck though.
Can I choose neither?
More Annoying….Broken Skulls or Severe Depression?
I’m gonna have to say severe depression. When I’m down I don’t know what to do. If I broke my skull I got some hot babe nurses giving me sponge baths.
You’re ridiculous Tony. I can bounce back from depression but a broken skull that’s rough. Neither injury is a pleasant one in FBB.
Final Showdown
Tonight’s NBA Finals game.
Celtics Ray Allen goes off for 30 points.
I’m going Celtics too although I’m going with Paul Pierce going crazy on Kobe.
TC…..
I say its going down tonight at 3 AM Eastern
Tomorrow if it was ashes but we got ducky shits going down late night.
Thats all we have folks. Till next time. I'm Michael Wilbon
I'm Tony the great Kornheiser.
You're not great.
In comparison to Taco Bell I am.
Sports Center is next!
Tony Kornheiser
PTI…..
Hey boys and girls and welcome to the first edition of UOSLR PTI. And when the wind blows hard and the sky is black….Ducks fly together. I’m Tony Kornheiser.
And I’m Michael Wilbon. Today we have a lot to talk about. Hardcap, Draft Grades, Position rankings, and special guest Charles Barkley will join us for five good minutes.
Barkley? No quiero taco bell.
Tony you are an enchilada. Ok Headlines!
Hard Cap
Tony we’ve recently seen more and more teams going over the hard cap in recent years. Should the hard cap be raised or are these owners just being foolish with their money?
Wilbon I’m a New York Yankees fan so I’m all about spending money.
Tony this is BASKETBALL.
I know but owner s should spend as much money as they need to in order to compete. If they can do it then why not? Raise the cap.
But Tony we’re seeing guys like Eddie Griffin get signing 100+ million dollar deals and this is a guy who’s averaging 11ppg for his career. I can name more names. The max contract is the death of so many teams.
Survival of the fittest Wilbon and my wallet is stacked!
Buzzzer…
Champs
Wilbon the Clippers won their first championship in franchise history. Whats next for the LA Clippers.
Tony I was so happy to see the Clippers win. They were faithful to their guys Arenas and Ming and they delivered them to the promise land.
Their boy AI went out in the sunset. They’re done. They are less of a one hit wonder than Bizmarkie.
You can’t take away a ring.
Paying Yao all that money will sink their franchise.
You can’t let Yao walk.
Buzzzzer……..
Timberwolves
The Timberwolves made Amare Stoudemire the highest paid PF in the game this week giving him a 160 million dollar contract. However they are over the hardcap. What’s next for the T-Wolves.
Tony, its obvious that Trunks is still looking to compete next season. He just got a contract renewal after showing some promise last season and the last thing they want to do is tear it down again in Minnesota.
Yes but Trunks can’t go all John Wayne by spending crazy money and think at the end of the movie he’s not going to get shot.
So what do they do Tony, tell me.
When the hardcap hits your eye like a big pizza pie trade Amare!
How do you trade that kind of contract? Who’s in the market? No one. They have to keep him. If they can find anyone dumb enough to take on Sean Williams that’s the move to make.
I just feel bad for James Harden he’s been stuck in Minnesota his whole career.
At least he has a ticket out now!
Good Point, Wilbon. Whats next?
Buzzzer….
Michael Gilchrist
Tony, We saw Perry Jones make one of the biggest splashes into UOSLR a #1 pick has ever seen. Can Michael Gilchirist keep that going?
Wilbon, you know I don’t speak highly of many people. Hell I’m not even nice to most people.
Yea I know your wife tells me that all the time.
Pshh nonsense. Michael Gilchrist will be the best big man in the league. EVER.
Wow. Ever? Forever ever?
Yes he can do things that no one else can do athletically as well as fundamentally. He’s the real deal.
Hmm so what does he average next season?
20,9,4, 1,2.
Ok we’ll see!
Final Buzzer…
Ok that’s all we have for headlines…when we get back we’ll take 5 good minutes to talk to our big mouth friend Charles Barkley.
Big mouthed? More like just big…
Theme music…..
Ok we’re back with UOSLR great Charles Barkley
Hey Tony you know what you can get at Taco Bell for $2.
Diarrhea?
No that’s turrible Tony. You should just shave that head of yours already look like Wilbon and I.
You know how terrible white guys look bald?
Why this got to be a race thing? Andre Aggassi, Matt Hassleback,
Jeff Garcia.
Yea I’m more of a Larry David though.
Ok I’ve had enough of this! Charles what do you left the league early then came back. What do you think of AI retiring?
He could have played more but why should he? He won 3 championships and left at the top of his game winning Finals MVP. That’s great just like the new cheese gordita at Taco Bell.
So do you think Etienne Priera is staying in the league too long?
No that guy is a freak. Another animal. I can’t explain what he does or how he does it. How old is that guy 39? He’s still whooping up those young boys. I want to see him play until he is 50. I think he can do it. He must eat Taco Bell.
Are there any players in the league right now that remind you of yourself?
You know there is only one Charles Barkley but there are few good impersonators. I’d probably say Dwight Howard.
Dwight Howard?
Yea he’s close to my level athletically and domination but like I said there is only one Chuck. Great show by the way best on TV. Love that dude more than D-Wade who hasn’t called me in a week. Whats up D-wade I thought we were friends.
Ok our time is up. Always a pleasure Charles.
Thanks for having me. (munching on a taco)
When we get back we’ll toss up some of the leagues hottest debates.
Theme music
Ok we’re back. What do we got stat boy?
Amare or Yao
Tony I got to go with my boy Yao Ming. He’s got the ring
Are you kidding? Amare could jump over him like Vince Carter does to people in other countries in the Olympics.
Maybe he isn’t as flashly but Yao is fundamental and does everything that his team needs him to do. That’s the player I want.
Amare FTW. Next!
Kyrie Irving or Corey Joseph
This is tough. I think they’re both going to be great.
Tony this is toss up not toss around. Pick!
Ok ok I’m going with Corey Joseph because the Duke curse in UOSLR is worse than Madden cover.
What? that’s crazy.
Jay Williams, Mike Dunleavy, Carlos Boozer…Do I need to say more?
Ducky or Ashes
We’re going to make someone really mad here.
Ashes is exactly that dust in the wind.
You quack me up. This isn’t even a debate. Ducky has earned the respect of everyone in the league. Ashes was great but out with the old and in with the new.
Charles Barkley or Taco Bell
Hahahaa….producers got jokes. I’m going to go with Charles Barkley because I don’t want diarrhea.
Tony have you ever had Taco Bell its amazing and cheap on the wallet. Its hard to pick it over my boy Chuck though.
Can I choose neither?
More Annoying….Broken Skulls or Severe Depression?
I’m gonna have to say severe depression. When I’m down I don’t know what to do. If I broke my skull I got some hot babe nurses giving me sponge baths.
You’re ridiculous Tony. I can bounce back from depression but a broken skull that’s rough. Neither injury is a pleasant one in FBB.
Final Showdown
Tonight’s NBA Finals game.
Celtics Ray Allen goes off for 30 points.
I’m going Celtics too although I’m going with Paul Pierce going crazy on Kobe.
TC…..
I say its going down tonight at 3 AM Eastern
Tomorrow if it was ashes but we got ducky shits going down late night.
Thats all we have folks. Till next time. I'm Michael Wilbon
I'm Tony the great Kornheiser.
You're not great.
In comparison to Taco Bell I am.
Sports Center is next!
